So what extraordinary gift did I get him? Well, when it comes to gift giving my mind doesn’t wander as much as when I’m thinking about things that involve chocolate… of any kind… but I thought I’d be a bit more romantic than usual and not only cook him supper (Russian chicken, our favorite) but get him a photo frame that actually is very romantic looking with the word love so very large. A cake was also included with all kinds of hearts and knick-knacks and our names plastered on it and a balloon filled with enough helium to give you a pretty good high that says “I Love You” (I’m original).

After tasting some not-so-lovely strawberry wine I decided that after gagging from it that I was not going to drink anymore or I was eventually going to throw-up. My boyfriend, noticing this decided to get me my other drink which was a Smirnoff Ice. Now I’ve had one before and actually enjoyed it but this one was revolting and I then came to the conclusion that alcohol was not cutting it for me tonight. With all of this said it is (kinda) plain to see that I’m nowhere near a drinker nor will ever become one. My boyfriend? Yep, same thing.

Going downstairs we both knew what was going to happen eventually. Which is kind of obvious… Supper is done, cake has been eaten, and now we are on our way downstairs… to play the new Donkey Kong! (and then do the not-so-secret thing) After a couple of levels and a bunch of balloons wasted on being horrible at the game I was slowly closing my eyes at only 9:20 PM. Why was I so tired? God knows but I needed sleep although I wanted to stay up and make sweet luvin’ on my anniversary. He wanted me to stay awake too (duh!) but noticed that my face and eyes were becoming more pitiful by the second with my slowly closing eyes so I ended up falling asleep only to have myself awake at 9 AM due to him having to go to work. Yep.

I’ve never felt so much heartache in my life than what this made me feel. I was planning to sing Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne but I just couldn’t. I was feeling so much emotion that I would break down in front of everyone.

My Grandmother was the most selfless person I can ever think of. She would play constantly with me when I was young even if it was the same thing over and over. I’m 17 now and she was doing the same thing with my 6 year old cousin. She never complained. Even when she was in the hospital and in pain, or was uncomfortable, or when she lost control of her bladder, she wouldn’t tell anyone. She was very independent but maybe that was also her weakness.

At the funeral I talked to a woman who remembered me from when I was young. She told me to never forget my Grandmother and to keep her image in my head and heart. I told her this was a difficult task because the image that is in both my head and my heart is the one the day before she died where she was nearly skin and bones. She held my hand and told me to remember the best memory I’ve ever had with her. I told her: “Susie and I always used to go to the cemetery after church with a bag of peanuts and feed the squirrels and watch them. It was my favorite thing to do and I loved her for always sharing it with me.” By this time I was crying. She looked into my eyes near tears herself and said “then remember those times.”

My friends showed up at the funeral for support. I didn’t ask them to but there they were with a big bouquet of flowers and some cards all in front of my family. It was so kind and so amazing. I took a picture of my flowers and placed the video of Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne below.

My new layout goes out to Susie (Grandmother) because purple is her favorite color. She can’t come back to me but I can go to her.

Questions

1. Have you lost someone/something that has made a huge impact on you?
2. (If yes) How long ago?
3. Do you know someone who has lost someone/something? If yes, explain their situation.

I only had 26 followers so having 50+ followers was a challenge for me so I decided to research, yet again, on how to get more followers easily. I came across Twiends.com where you sign up and receive 20 credits. These credits are used to give out to people for when they click on you to either follow (Twitter), like (Facebook pages), or view (your website). When a person clicks on one of those three the credits are taken from you and given to them. To receive more credits you click on THEIR links.

I went researching for other ways to make simple cash and came across Adf.ly. This is where you get paid to shorten your URLs and when someone clicks them. I literally just started using this so I’ve only gotten 3 views so far with only ONE of my links. You get paid with less than a cent (so like Today: 3 views, $0.00140 earned) and it’s cent to your paypal account once a month on the date that they choose (next is November 1st). If you have over $5.00 in your adf.ly account it is sent to your paypal account but if it’s under you have to wait until next month.

What I did was I changed the link for my website on Twiends.com to my adf.ly link so that way I’m making money while getting hits.

I also came across Paybox.me. It’s another site like Paypal but if you sign up to be an Earlybird user you receive $50, $5 per referral, and it says up to $20 each day but I get up to $40. The only thing about this though is that Paybox has it’s own currency which is said to be all of the world’s currencies put together or something along the lines of that so whether it’s close to US or Canadian dollars is all up to how popular Paybox will be.

Whether any of these are scams or not, I am not sure… but you have nothing to lose with using any of these sites at all. So why not try them?

All of these links have been put through adf.ly so if you click on them you’re making me money!

He then admitted to me that he is always sad when it comes to our relationship so I told him that I would rather see him happy with another person than to be sad with me and that I would let him go. He stormed off crying and I walked after him because I knew he was extremely upset. He started hyperventilating and wasn’t able to breathe so I had to calm him down.

I told him that we can’t be together if I make you sad and that fights are going to continue to happen because he doesn’t have the ability to not let small things go. Letting small things get to a person and causing a fight over them is not worth it because it ruins the relationship. Also, if I say how I feel about anything or he asks me how I’m feeling and I tell him he gets angry with me if I tell him anything that I feel about him. I think that’s wrong. Even if what I say makes him upset I can’t help how I feel. Am I supposed to hide how I feel about everything in fear that he will get angry if I say anything? If so then I’m not doing it. I can’t and won’t change who I am. Sure, I’ll change some of the bad things and I have done that but this may be too much change. I told him he needs to stop letting little things get to him and he just said well you need to stop doing little things.

I don’t know what to do. Is it my responsibility to make this relationship work? Is it his because he needs to learn those things? Is it both of ours?

Taking time off from each other isn’t something that’s necessary. We only see each other 1 day a week. If we are lucky sometimes maybe 2 and they are never full days.

I feel a break up coming on and I don’t want this. We planned to have children together and he’s so amazing. He just has an anger problem. He’s unlike any other guy because he doesn’t look at women like their meat, thinks using women is disgusting, and is just overall the most amazing guy.

I’m breaking apart at the seams as I write this… I can barely see the keyboard.

I have no classes next semester. I am free. Free I tell you! Except for the fact that I’ll be working full-time next semester. I switched my schedule around completely so I could only have 3 classes (I only need 3 credits to graduate) for the first semester.

Speaking of work I had my first fry shift Thursday the 9th. It was great! I was a fast learner and my crew trainer loves me. I had another person helping me on fries and am not sure how I’ll manage without the extra help. There’s a lot to remember and I tend to be bad at remembering a lot. Hopefully I’ll do good though.

A couple of blog posts back… (titled “Swiper No Swiping”) please disregard that. I’m clearly allowed to not have any freedom of speech what-so-ever because if I do it will cause drama and drama is something I don’t need at all right now.

I have been working on a few tutorials for Paint Shop Pro. Currently I have 2 and will not officially post them until I think I have enough.

As I’m typing Hello Kitty Online is currently downloading. I’m insanely excited because I’m a huge fan of Hello Kitty. Maybe soon I’ll take a picture of all of my Hello Kitty things and make a page just for them on my site to show-off.

For Christmas my Aunt may be ordering some Hello Kitty things for me off of Ebay from Hong Kong. Here are the pictures of what I’d be getting…

I would kill also for this…

I’m worried. Not too worried but… worried enough to make a blog post about it.

My boyfriend also works at McDonalds which is where I now work. He wants me to work at the Walmart McDonalds instead because the people at the big store hit on everyone there but everytime I go to the Walmart one it’s always females there. He likes to call them ‘older women’ in their ’40’s’ but they never are unless that’s what I see but I can’t see out back… Dustin likes to make people laugh. Always have always will and sometimes that comes across to girls as flirting and since Dustin does it a lot he always looks like a huge flirt but he really isn’t. If I were to work at Walmart with him I’d have to see all of that huge flirting and I will end up crying and I will be a cashier. Dustin even told me that sometimes they hit on him too but not a lot. If I were to see that happen I’d probably cry for that too. I don’t like competition even though it kind of wouldn’t really be a competition because I know Dustin is mine forever. I still don’t like the thought of another girl flirting with my man. I’ve never had a serious relationship before and I’ve never had a problem with Dustin like this. It’s not his fault.

What I’m basically trying to say is that I will cry because too much emotion is inside of me basically 24/7.

Yep, just finished training last night at McDonalds A.K.A my new job which I’m totally excited about. We watched videos for 2 and a half hours which we extremely boring… grr… After we went and did maintenance and while I was moping the floor a little girl asked me what my name was. When I told her I asked her hers. Her name was Carly. She then introduced me to her Mom who was really cranky when she was ordering (I wasn’t the cashier though) I said Hello and she smiled and said it back. Then a woman’s son decided to go on the play equipment (not the huge play stuff, we don’t have that here) and the woman couldn’t get the boy away from it to go order. I suggested that I would watch him which now I realize was a really bad idea because that means I would be entirely responsible for him. His Mom came back and the boy decided to run across my moped floor and he slipped. Smart kid, huh?

After work (I get paid for training!) I went to my friend Jordan’s which was where my boyfriend and my best friend Angel were. We went out on a double date to Jungle Jims and it was great. We stayed over for longer because the boys decided it would be great to have Chipotle sauce and their… behinds… kind of exploded because of the sauce. It was rather amusing, tehehehehe.

Today I’m going to the mall to pick up my work shoes which are going to be about 45$ and then I need some school supplies. This is the only day I have left to do it (school starts Tuesday) because there’s a hurricane coming tonight and tomorrow. Hurricanes for us just include wind and rain. It’s not an actual hurricane.

My site looks like crap in IE.

Photo from: Lolzombie.com