Who am I?

Good ques­tion. I hon­estly don’t know who I am yet and believe that blog­ging about my every­day life will try and help me. What I do know is that my name is Michaela – mid­dle name is Sue, which comes from my Grand­mother. I’m an only child and I’ve been lonely most of my life until I found the love of my life on Decem­ber 31st, 2009. My first lan­guage is Eng­lish, my sec­ond is French, and I am cur­rently (and slowly) learn­ing some Latin. My birth­day is March 29th. I’m emo­tional, plan­ning, ide­al­is­tic, harmony-seeking, under­stand­ing, peace-loving, sen­si­tive, quiet, sym­pa­thetic, com­pli­cated, incon­spic­u­ous, warm-hearted, com­plex, imag­i­na­tive, inspir­ing and helpful.

My life wasn’t as great as it is now. My child­hood was unbear­able. I was lied to until I was 9 about my real father — I had a fake one. Then later on when my Mother got a new boyfriend I was molested basi­cally every­day from the ages of 8–15. After meet­ing my boyfriend Dustin, I quickly got so com­fort­able with him that I decided to tell him the things that were hap­pen­ing to me. He took action imme­di­ately and saved my life. I went to the guid­ance coun­selor at my school and told him who called the cops and took me to the sta­tion where I had to tell every­thing. My Mom was called and she had no idea what was going on and thought that Dustin did some­thing to me. After I told my story the police brought her into another room and told her what I had told them. They later on brought me into that room and she was bawl­ing and kept say­ing “Why him? I was going to marry him!”.

That was the day that my Mom was dead to me. I hated her then. I don’t believe I’ll ever fully like her again. Not that I ever did to be hon­est. She never really paid atten­tion to me. She made it seem as if it was all about her by say­ing that. She con­tin­ued to see him not long after this was all out in the open because she said she couldn’t help who she loves. I under­stand that you can’t help who you love but if it was me I’d damned well love my child more than the one who ruined my child’s life.

The man was in his late 40’s when it started hap­pen­ing. It lead me to be extremely cau­tious with men and I have a hard time trust­ing men in gen­eral. Dustin is the only one I trust and still some­times I’m uncom­fort­able with him because I feel as if he’s just here to use me even though I know he’s not.

I used to get overly offended by rape jokes because really… they’re not funny when you were a vic­tim of molesta­tion but I’ve grown to be less offended by them unless they’re directed to me. There’s a lot of sick peo­ple out there.

My whole point of even hav­ing a blog is to show oth­ers who may have been through what I have that they can still have a life. Don’t let it stop you from liv­ing. Not all men are like this though some­times it may seem like there’s an end­less sup­ply of jerks out there.

Ran­dom Facts


1. I refuse to watch movies where it's girls being used by guys or guys just saying "Hey let's go get some pussy!".
2. My boyfriend and friends mean the world to me.
3. Though I can't play it, piano is the only instrument that makes me feel.
4. I'm kick-ass at Halo 3 on Xbox 360.
5. I get frustrated easily but only if I'm aggravated at something else.
6. I try to see someone the other person's perspective whilst in a fight.
7. I actually enjoy Miley Cyrus's slow music.
8. I am always there when you need me even if we're not close.
9. If you're having a bad day I always try to make you feel better even if I'm having a bad day.
10. My bestfriend is a feline.


Favorite Bands

I love music that makes me feel and that means slow (or slow-ish) songs with a lot of emo­tion and pas­sion in them. Below are a few of my favorite bands.